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I can and can’t believe we’ve started November already, I am a bit late as life been getting ahead of me. October feels like the shortest yet longest month at the same time, each week was so different that it felt like a quarter has passed lol. I am thankful for journaling as I truly would have forgotten the little details with life moving so fast. — Stephanie
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Lifestyle, Lows, Lessons
Heads up, this month was filled with work updates and catch ups, so so much was going on each week professionally. If that is not your jam, well here is your warning lol before you keep reading. OK now let’s get into it.
I started off the month with a bang, attending my first customer technology conference and taking on the mainstage of all stages. I still wonder how I mustered up the courage to do something my shy younger self would’ve never imagined, yet at the same time now that I was able to do that — it made all the public speaking opportunities that came after feel slightly less scary. So much more than the speaking opportunity itself, this conference was a learning experience of all sorts, both professionally and personally. We can start with the lows and end with the highs. I wasn’t sure if my peer would back out so I was getting anxiety up until she confirmed she would go, then on the day and time of our flight, she was nowhere to be found…I still think back to the anxiety I felt and the immediate logical options I started conjuring up on how I will do this alone lol. Fast forward to the story, turns out she just overslept and was able to book the next flight.
Beyond finding and sharing my voice, this conference taught me a lot about being comfortable in my own skin - not necessarily on stage, but all the people that kept recognizing us after our session. I’ve wondered what’s it like to be famous and now after this experience where people kept coming up to me (even in the bathroom) lol while it’s nice to get recognition, I realized center of attention really is not for me. Perhaps it is because this is also my first large conference where I felt like there was still so much for me to learn from others, that it felt awkward to be seen as the expert. I won’t get too deep in this next low, but I did feel like I could have spoke up for myself more - but self reflection is key and I now know what I should do next time. On a positive note, I learned a lot and got inspired by hearing from other customers. Given my peer’s situation, I took on most of the conference alone, and really learned to insert myself in situations where I do not know anyone. It did feel awkward at first, perhaps it is because it is my first large tech conference or that I felt young and irrelevant at a Product conference as a marketer, but I knew I had to make the most out of it while I get the rare opportunity to be here. From these experiences, I learned my favorite way to spark up conversations with strangers is actually through long lunch or coffee lines haha so much better than speed networking roundtables or happy hours. It’s crazy how in college I was scared to fly alone, and now I feel comfortable doing so - while also taking on a conference mostly alone. I’d like to think life rewards us when we put ourselves out there. While I was inserting myself at the professional events of the conference, on the last night there was a rap concert and man did it feel even more awkward solo inserting myself but I told myself I am already here so I might as well get closer. To my luck, life rewarded me with meeting a new friend who’s also named Stephanie:).
After an eventful week in Raleigh, the next day was such a bang as well. I got to reunite with Tammie for our round 2 Luna Li concert and man I think I can listen to her live for a round 3. Hands down one of my top performers live, which is a lot coming from me. I was in awe by her talent both as a singer and musician, especially as her and her band were not feeling well that day yet still put on a show. Little did I know that spontaneously, Tammie and I would go to Yetep after -- it’s been a hot minute since I’ve seen Yetep or been this spontaneous, but man was it so worth it. I felt like I was back in my undergrad days jamming out to his mixes. Also somehow managed to get another pic :D IF things couldn’t get more spontaneous, literally the next day - Tiana who lives a couple cities away from SF - called me that she’ll be in town and wants to catch up the next day over a nice dinner event. I was tired but couldn’t say no because we rarely see each other now due to proximity, so I decided to be spontaneous and say yes - what are the odds she takes me as a +1 to a wedding lol fr. All in all I had so much fun celebrating love, once again putting myself out there to get to know others when I don’t know most of the room, and catching up with Tiana. It especially made me feel filled with love to learn that Tiana and Dylan invited me because they were rooting for my happiness.
Little did I know, after the conference in Raleigh - I would come back to being voluntold last minute to put together a presentation for another conference at HQ. I knew I would help out but I did not expect last minute putting together a ppt and public speaking. While the week prior experience did help, I still was so stressed doing everything so last minute, while still mustering the courage to prep myself to speak out yet again. Not my best TBH I couldve done a better job preparing - but I am still proud of myself for taking it on last minute and inviting others to share their voice and story too. While I was initially stressed about going to the conference at HQ, especially the commute - so I booked my own place because sadly I couldn’t get budget this time for a hotel. I kept contemplating if I should splurge on a hotel right by my office, or save significantly with an economical option at a hotel in a different part of SJ but I would have to drive. I decided to go economical as I am house poor hah and while I was a little anxious about staying alone at a not as familiar part of town, and getting back late alone as a girl, what are the odds that the universe is truly watching over me because my dear friend Thuan from LA - happened to text me just days before that she’s in SJ and would like to catch up. That in itself is already wild, but what are the odds that she actually booked the exact same hotel…perhaps just a coincidence, but I’d like to call this fate and I am usually not one to believe these things. This just shifted the whole perspective from me as I was anxious to go back to the hotel and now I was excited - we had a dinner catch up and yapped so so much, my heart is full and I am so thankful for this impromptu reunion.
As stressful as I am making the HQ conference sound, I ended up actually having a lot of meaningful moments as well - getting to know my coworkers who I rarely get to see (like once a year rare), and getting to bond with them in a different way that I don’t think I would’ve if my usual peer was in person but she was unable to make it due to a personal injury. I ended up bonding so much with my coworkers that it surprised me that I stayed for karaoke lol
With so much going on professionally, it was hard to keep up personally - each weekend had some other task I had to do for the home, whether that’s setting up wifi, plumbing, or kickstarting construction downstairs. However at the same time, I tried to spend as much quality time as possible with my family and Ashley on the weekends, because I won’t be in the same neighborhood in SF anymore. I am truly thankful for each catch up but I also feel like I haven’t been the best friend or daughter because I am being pulled in so many directions so I can’t fully be in on one thing. I am happy that I got to celebrate my mom and grandfather’s birthday, but I wish I had more time planning it. I am happy I got to catch up with Christina, Ashley, Tammie, Thuan, Tiana, and Sadie - kinda wild now listing this out lol - but a part of me feels like I could’ve done better in being present. I was catching up with Jin this month virtually (which I am thankful for as well) and kinda wild how we always seem to go through similar seasons.
This month has been such a privilege both professionally and personally - I thank the universe for all that was in store, especially so many spontaneous moments that I cherish.
Most people do not like waiting for things, but in my adult years - I can wait. LOL. Time slow down. After such an eventful month and busy weeks already in November, I am looking forward to rest and sleep as I know November will be such a memorable one~
My pick of the month: Sharing my voice
No picture because I am shy + would also like to be more private professionally. But the highlight of this month for me would be speaking on the mainstage. I never thought I would speak to an auditorium filled with industry professionals to share my story, I also understand that this isn’t an opportunity that comes often if at all. While public speaking isn’t my strong suit, I’ll forever be thankful and cherish this once in a lifetime experience.
Chat soon in December,
—Stephanie
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